Added: 09/13/2006 |
Virtual realityAlthough you may feel as though you already know each other, you have yet to become familiar with each other's physical appearance, and that can take some time. First face-to-face encounters can be awkward or even shocking, regardless of the positive feelings you already have for each other.
Be prepared that not all people will look exactly as the pictures they sent you. And even if they do, a picture is only a static impression. The way the person moves, smiles, talks can add charm to the visual image or take it away.
Make your first real-world impression by being calm and confident. Even though you may be nervous or anxious, try to relax and be yourself. Many people can sense when a person is trying to project an image other than their own. Savor the excitement of the first encounter. Have fun. Relax. Keep smiling. People are perceived as more appealing when they are enjoying themselves. Your date will form an immediate first impression of you, usually in the first ten seconds, based on some combination of these attributes:
• posture
• walk
• body language
• physical characteristics
• smile
• eye contact
First impression is the most important, yet many of us fail to put our best foot forward during early romantic encounters. Like it or not, dating takes place in a competitive environment, and the next positive romantic impression you make may lead to a life-long love- a remarkable return on a considerably minor investment.
Before you go out on the first date reread your correspondence with this person. Beware if what your date told you before is different from what she/he is telling now. Ask questions. Use the first date as a chance to fill in the gaps and check if the person lives up to your great expectations.
Listen and read between the lines. Look for red flags that tell you that this person isn't right for you. People don't know their dates' preferences early on, so they are open and share many aspects of themselves.
Keep first date short. Keep second and third dates somewhat short, too. It's so much better to end on a high note than a sour one. On a first date, it's much easier to be charming for a brief time than all evening long. Don't wear out your welcome.
Don't expect too much from the first “real” date. Treat dating as a game. You both may need to get to know each other better "in real life," before getting serious. Then again, you may hit it off right from the moment your eyes meet. Just go into the date relaxed without great expectations, and play it by ear.
Article comments:
No comments for this article yet. Post your comment now!
