Most of us have heard jokes about how marriage leads to the end of thriving sex life. Groucho Marx is quoted as saying "Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's not doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere". Sexual disfunction and dissatisfaction are widely experienced among normal, healthy marriages. It has been eleven great years with my husband, and sex is fantastic, when we have it. It is not unusual for couples to go through phases of decreasing libidos, and/or wandering eyes, that commonly plague long-term relationships.
Companionship, friendship, children, social views, and financial bonds are just a few reasons that people work through the many complications of living day after day with the same person. There really is no way to recover those exciting first years of courtship, the butterflies and arousing conversation with someone you have spent the past decade with. This is a feeling that comes with discovering new details about a person, and with initial contact. So what does one do when the honeymoon is over? Of course, it is widely forbidden in our society to seek fulfillment of these urges through extramarital affairs, but many have found the swingers lifestyle an effective way to add vitality to their married lifes without 'cheating' on their partner.
If you are looking for adventurous new relationships with other couples, you are not alone. Type in 'swingers' in any search engine and you will find dozens of swinger sites, many of which boast discreet arrangements for married folks to pair up with other couples. Wife swapping appears to be something that occurs all over the world, and the websites offer access to bios and photos of happy couples looking for outside relationships. Personal ads offer encounters of every flavor, with choices for nationality, language, and sexual orientation, to name a few. Single swingers are in high demand to join heterosexual, and homosexual couples, in three-way rings. In fact, every conceivable combination of gender and number can be selected from drop down lists for women seeking lesbian couples, gay couples seeking bisexual, etc.
Studies suggest that up to 30% of people that use online dating services are married, so it is not surprising that many of the swingers sites cater to this section of the population. Although single swingers may worry about people finding out about their lifestyle from personal ads they place, swingers in committed relationships, whether or not their spouse takes part in activities, are often hesitant about posting their sexual fantasies on websites. Risk of discovery by others outside of the swingers circle could mean serious complications for a person's reputation in the community, and potentially have negative impacts on their lifehood. Moreover, parents have to consider the damage that can be done to their children if a neighbor kid happens to run across Mom's image on the internet and decides to say something at school. For these, and many other reasons married swingers must take extra precautions when searching for that extra spice in their sex life.
It is normal for relationships to feel old, for men and women to grow bored with each other and seek excitement. For now, my husband and I will continue working through our marriage shortfalls the old fashioned way. But if I ever want to swing, I know there are plenty of other upstanding married people out there looking for me, and I know where to find swinging singles.