I don't put a lot of stock in superstition. I worry about enough things as it is. I don't think I'm very superstitious either. I mean, I read my horoscope every day but it doesn't dictate how I lead my life. So when my future wife told me about the significance of the number 17 and how it affected Italian dating rituals, I kind of rolled my eyes. If she believed that strongly in this superstition, then why agree to go out tonight? We could have postponed our date for later. But out of respect for me, she decided to throw caution to wind. I was impressed. I reminded her that as an American the number 17 meant nothing to me. So we were safe.
I have since learned that Italians have a wide range of superstition. Not all of them related to dating rituals. My mother-in-law, who is one of the most superstitious people I've ever met, let's me know all the time how my luck is going. Just the other day she told me she dreamt of a black cat - which by the way is sometimes regarded as a sign of bad luck in the future. I reminded her that she dreamt of the cat and not I. But I'm her son-in-law, she said. Bad luck by default.
Despite the superstition my wife had regarding the number 17, we managed to have a lot of fun that night. She is no where near as superstitious as her mother or her sister. In fact the first time I met her mother she gave me some advice about the "evil eye". "You're gonna cause problems," she mumbled. I was a foreigner and people were going to look and circulate rumors. So if she suspected someone was casting a dark look at her or her daughter's, she would place her thumb between her forefinger and middle finger while making a fist. This will counteract the evil spell, she'd say. "I use this one myself" I replied, as I extended my middle finger and pointed it her way. "It works every time." It's no wonder that 20 years later me and my mother-in-law haven't exactly hit it off.
On the other hand, there's so much superstition regarding flowers that I'm inclined to stop giving them. I'll never forget the time I bought 15 white lilies and spread the petals all over the bed and lay down in the middle. I was feeling romantic and wanted to surprise my wife. I placed candles all around the bed and dimmed the lights. My wife came home and practically had a heart attack. She thought she walked into a wake. Well, how did I know lilies are funeral flowers? All I wanted was to make love to my wife. Let me tell you, it sure didn't happen that night.
A lot of other superstition apparently is universal. A black cat crossing your path for example. About six years ago, my wife called me at work. She was all excited. Not only had a black cat crossed in front of her car but she ran over the darn thing. She was doomed. I could tell just by listening to her. I told her not to worry. You don't get jinxed because the cat doesn't look both ways before it crosses the street. So what happens? Later that day my wife goes to her aerobics class and snaps her Achilles tendon. Just a coincidence. It could happen to anybody.
When it comes to dating rituals and dating in general, I'd say success has as much to do with superstition as the plain old luck does. Roses, candy, holding open a door. Some things strike me as common sense. Treat your lady with respect and that respect will come back to you ten-fold. And that's not superstition either. Just plain old common sense.