Added: 09/15/2006 |
Is an Authoritative Parenting Style Necessary?An authoritative parenting style does not necessarily mean that a family follow Draconian rules with parents behaving like mini-dictators towards their children. Being authoritative is a part of the parental package included with all other assorted learning skills that parents have to pass on to their children such as sympathy, understanding and advice. Authority is simply part of their education in order to allow children to identify between right and wrong.
Suggesting that an authoritative parenting style is necessary may in today's liberal environment appear harsh. However if parents show that they themselves respect authority, that is the law, their children will soon realise this and adopt a similar stance. To children the law is represented by their parents and therefore respect for their parents is an imperative. Children tend to mimic their parents in order to identify themselves as a part of a family, it is therefore essential that parents exhibit the traits that they wish their children to adopt.
The term 'authoritative parenting style' can be misconstrued to mean the harsh treatment of children, including physical violence. However this is not the intention of the term in this instance, rather it should be applied to parents who simply wish to lead their children rather than be led by their children. Parents are the first authority figures that children encounter and for that reason it is essential that children learn to respect their parents. Even the most rebellious child will respect parents that show both kindness and firmness when necessary.
An authoritative parenting style will be required longer for some than others simply because no two children are the same. However, all children generally follow a similar line of thinking. For example we all test our boundaries to see how far it is that we can go before someone is annoyed, and that's precisely what children do as they grow up. They look to their parents for guidance in the first instance, and as they grow older they will be looking at what behaviour is expected at schools and then outside in the adult world.
Respect is not something that is generally given freely, however because of the relationship between children and parents, the tendency is for children to respect their parents from the moment they understand who they are. Yet retaining a child's respect can be difficult if the parents do nothing that the child can identify as supportive. Support of a child is one of the key areas whereby parents are able to gain their confidence and, once you have gained their confidence they will be more amenable to follow the parent's ideas and importantly give them respect. The parent who possesses their child's respect possesses the necessary authoritative parenting style to steer their child in the direction they believe is most good for them. An authoritative parenting style could then be applied as a parent having a strong power of suggestion which their child more often than not follows. Authoritative teaching only really fails when it is too harsh or totally ignored. Finding the balance should not prove too difficult, simply ask yourself how you would feel in your child's situation before you speak.
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