Coming out of Halloween most people, in particular kids, have a sugar buzz from hell. Think about it. Enough sugary substances are consumed between October 31st and December 25th that just about everyone breathing, sitting stuffed in front of a lazy television, probably hung over, on New Years Day pledges to go on a diet. Most people make crazy promises like they’ll never eat chocolate again. Fact is that there is a ton of candy, pies, and cakes devoured in the fall months around the holidays. No sweet is safe, except maybe the fruit cake. Nobody really eats those things. They’re supposed to be paperweights I think, and some stupid fool somewhere down the line decided that they were hungry enough to brave eating one. Since then they’ve been called “cake” by many but I have my suspicions. Anyway, the theme that runs constant in most if not all Holidays in the fall and winter is that of sugar. This is most readily apparent and most true at Halloween when tiny scalawags and scoundrels come to your door all dressed up in an effort to extort candy from you. This is also most apparent at any Halloween party. Examine any Halloween party food and you’ll find an assortment of sweets, from candied apples that are glazed in pure sugar and caramel, to cookies and the aforementioned pumpkin pie. Halloween party food doesn’t have to be extravagant to be good, but creativity helps. Most people bake cookies with horror themes like hanging men or pirates or witches. Pies often suffer the same fate, as they are usually ghoulish in design, with RIP and Happy Halloween written in what looks like fake blood over jack-o-lantern ORANGE icing.
While the fall months are loaded with joy and fun and mirth, there’s no way you can escape the Holidays without packing on the pounds. It’s just not possible. There’s too much good food and too little time. One helping at Thanksgiving dinner, I think not. And who wants to get all dressed up to go trick-or-treating for one measly hour. No, the fall Holidays are evil Holidays full of artery choking goodness, and glazed with sugar. One thing is for certain; if you don’t want to balloon up too much during the Holidays, beware the orange food!
Perhaps it’s something in the orange color that carries and spreads the fat gene throughout the human body. I don’t know, but there should definitely be some kind of serious medical testing going on in some medical lab somewhere to find out for sure what it is about the orange colored food that makes you gain weight and makes you want to do nothing but eat and nap for almost two solid months.