The website for Waterloo, Iowa reads "Big City Excitement...Hometown Hospitality!" Heck, I'm just about sporting wood already! Hometown hospitality! That's what I'm talking about! I hope to be dating Waterloo women this Friday night, and what's more hospitable than knocking on Mrs. Jones front door and asking if she minds if I spunked her daughter in the back of my Chevy? I can tell me and this city are going to get along just fine.

Of course, I'm an old skeptic from way back. Hometown hospitality? Nothing is ever that easy. I decided to do some research on the Internet and the first thing that pops up regarding Waterloo, Iowa is an ad reminding everybody about the upcoming National Dairy Cattle Congress. Excuse me... did you just say DAIRY CATTLE CONGRESS? I'm trying my best to lay the groundwork for dating Waterloo women and the best I can come up with is the annual National Dairy Cattle Congress?

I'm not sure Waterloo single women can attend an event like that. In fact, I'm not sure Waterloo single women WANT to attend an event like that. Sure, for nearly a century the citizens of Waterloo and its surrounding communities have been coming to the Dairy Cattle Congress in Waterloo looking for a good time and to be entertained. But be entertained by doing what? Milking a cow? Shoeing a horse? The press release says many of the citizens get entertained by "... walking through the barns or experiencing the nostalgia and adventure when viewing farm machinery".   Well you got me on that one. I can't tell you how many times I seek out a barn when I'm looking for adventure. Unless of course I have the preacher's daughter with me. But that's another story. Dating Waterloo girls is turning out to be a bigger challenge than I ever expected.

Time for more research. Waterloo, Iowa has a shopping mall, they have restaurants, they have some nightclubs or at least things that pass for nightclubs. It's difficult to say, because there's not really anything that goes in depth regarding any of this stuff. So I'm starting to worry now. If a person is curious or even casually interested about dating Waterloo girls what do they do? I tracked down some singles on-line ads for Waterloo, Iowa and I was kind of... well... scared doesn't quite express how I felt when I saw a few of the photo's of these women. "Worried" that perhaps some of them may be serial killers is a little more realistic.

I think the trick is to fall back on some tried and true strategies when it comes to dating Waterloo women. I haven't done it in quite some time but perhaps there's something valuable in going to church. Maybe at church or the get-together afterwards I can meet some God-fearing, tent-pole bobbing single girls from Waterloo who are looking for something a little more profound than coffee and donuts. Or perhaps I should volunteer at a homeless shelter. I'm not sure Waterloo even has a homeless element much less a homeless shelter, but if they do, then this will surely demonstrate that I am a caring, touchy-feely kind of person. As long as no homeless person tries to be touchy or feely with me I'll be ok.

I wanted to give speed-dating a try, but Waterloo doesn't have any speed-dating events. They do however have speed-SKATING events and maybe I'll have more luck dating Waterloo girls by trying my hand at that. Or better yet, maybe I'll just scratch Waterloo, Iowa off of my "Tour the Midwest" agenda.