Added: 01/05/2006 |
A tie a belt or a sweater. Those are gifts that can't fail, right? But come on, there has to be something more interesting, more profound and certainly more fun than those three items. What is it about the male species that makes it so difficult to purchase christmas gifts for men? The answer is almost blissfully ignorant: men are p-r-a-c-t-i-c-a-l! And if it's one thing that a woman tends not to be when purchasing a gift, it's practical!
Think about it: a woman goes into a store, walks up to the counter and sees a hammer and a silk ascot lying on the counter. Which will she consider makes for one of the ideal christmas gifts for men? Now, she may know in her heart-of-hearts that the hammer is something her husband, boyfriend, lover can really use. But it's the ascot that she will purchase. Why? Because it looks nice! It will look good on him! The ascot, or the tie, or the belt offers a chance to dress the man up a bit. The male on the other hand, opens up his gift and fake gloats over yet another belt...or tie...or whatever. He smiles, praises the obvious good taste his significant other has, and hopes like hell that this good gesture on his part will lead to sex later in the evening.
The thing is, christmas gifts for men need not be so difficult. Again, all it takes is some acknowledgement on the part of the female that Christmas gifts for men need to serve a purpose. A little compromise and collaboration seem to go a long way as well! Consider purchasing gifts in clusters of three: a battery-operated hand drill, a subscription to the "Avid Sportsman" and a silk bathrobe -- which is what the woman wanted to give the guy in the first place! The hard-to-find-a-gift-for-male should receive the gifts in ascending order: first the wife hooks her guy with the magazine subscription. Then she reels him in with the portable drill, and then Ba-Da-Bing! She lands him with the bathrobe! This time the husband really does gloat over his wife when he goes in to the office the next day!
It should be noted that christmas gifts for men can also go in an entirely different direction, yet the woman can still come out on top (if you know what I mean, and I think you do). When it comes to men, cheap christmas presents count almost as much as power tools. Cheap Christmas present in this instance means "funny" as opposed to a gift with a value of $1.99. Next time the wife, lover, girlfriend (hey maybe it's all three) wants to score points, score a laugh, and be forever revered just remember -- go funny! How about a glow-in-the dark condom? Makes a great gift! Or cotton briefs with the wife's photo on the crotch! A winner to be sure! The wife may feel these Christmas gifts for men are vulgar, but to a man they are great! What man wouldn't be proud to have a mounted mackerel on his wall that starts singing every time sometime walks by?
There will always be room for classy presents: A diamond tie-pin, an engraved money clip, a framed photo of the Mr. & Mrs., monogrammed suspenders. They all have their place in a man's closet or at least in his bedroom. But those gifts will be a lot more appreciated if they are supplemented with useful items that make a man feel like a man!
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